Enough of that shit: A new attitude

Ok. Enough about excrement.

I am worried about my next few races. I haven't been training consistently. I am tired a lot. The heat is stifling. I feel lethargic and I sleep as much as possible. This has caused me a lot of anxiety-- "Am I ready? What if I get a flat tire? What if I fall down? What if the streets turn to pudding?" I have decided to re-frame my thinking about my upcoming races. I am doing them simply for pleasure.

• Blood, Sweat, & Beers 10 mile trail run= FUN in the SUN.
  
• Marin Century = Enjoy as many snacks at the rest stops as possible.
  
• Folsom Olympic Triathlon = I get to ride on the some of the same course as the Tour of California Riders.
  
• Napa Century = Stay an extra day and enjoy some wine tasting.
  
  and finally,
  
  
• HIT III Half Ironman= My first half ironman and I will do it with a smile the whole time.

It took me a little time to realize that I need to enjoy the training, enjoy the racing otherwise why continue? I started triathlon for two reasons: First, because it seemed that everyone in my life thought it would be a great big joke-- ha ha look at karen try to run, try to swim, try to ride a bike. I wanted them to show them there was no longer anything to laugh at. Second, I wanted to be fit--I wanted that spare tire (muffin top) gone, I wanted buff arms and I wanted my heart strong. But the reason to continue is more elusive. I've decided I need to enjoy my time out there on the bike, enjoy the freezing lake and enjoy the fact that my legs work pretty good and I can run and sprint just like when I was a little girl. I don't need to be fastest (& I won't be) but when I was 5 and running around the block, I didn't care that I was fastest-- I was just happy running.

That is the attitude I will attempt to take with me forward to every event and to every training ride, run, and swim. Really.

An Ode to Poop, Part Doo

Since at least a couple of you were disappointed in my earlier post “An Ode to Poop” for its metaphorical flavor, I’ve decided to do a real post on poo.

The information below was told to me in 11th grade by my high school physiology teacher. Ms. Noyes prefaced her lecture by stating, “we never talk about poop, so here is some information you should all know.” Thanks Ms. Noyes. Thank god Physiology was first period and not the period right before lunch.

“There are several things about poop that one should know.

It should float
It should be ‘mocha colored’
It should be six inches long (That’s what she said)
It should be solid (1 piece)
It should NOT leave skidmarks
There should NOT be identifiable food in it.
Everyone should go at least once a day.”

Never in my life, did I think I would be posting information about Poop. How far I’ve veered from the primrose path.

An Ode to Poop --Thursday Three

• In 22 years I can retire.
  
• My first swim back since May triathlon was an exercise in humility. How can someone loose so much fitness in 1 month?
  
• RR#1 thinks she's "too pretty to work" a la The Housewives of New Jersey. Sometimes I am glad that I am not linked via DNA to her.
  
  

Now for our regularly scheduled program

Due to the sucky "help" (and I use that term loosely) via blogger, I have been unable to post comments. I went online to 'accept' comments from you good people and to 'reject' comments from all the chinese spammers who apparently love my blog but was greeted to this error:

Please bear with me. I have turned off comment moderation for the time being--Chinese Spammers rejoice.

Trail Shoes Galore: A review of the Asics Trabuco and the Asics 2140 Trail edition

A little background: I LOVE running shoes. Some women may have a closet full of Jimmy Choos or maybe some Cole Haans. Not me. I have at least 20 pairs of running shoes. Everything from Nikes, New Balance, and Asics to Saucony and even some Brooks. For a short time I even had a pair of Mizuno trail shoes, but last year when I signed up for the Blood, Sweat, and Beers Run and began doing trail running in earnest, I headed over to the crack house fleet feet and looked at two pairs—the Asics 2140 and the Asics Trabuco.

Asics 2140 Trail Edition: Built on the same foot last as the standard Asics 2140, the trail edition has some modifications to it that make it an excellent choice for light trail running. It has a tighter weave to the mesh than the standard 2140—this of course disallows rocks, dirt, debris from getting into the shoe so easily. This isn’t to say that stuff DOESN’T get into the shoe Many times I emptied my shoes on the trail, but in comparison with a regular running shoe, the issue of, “Crap there is a rock/stick/dirt/sand in my shoe” was significantly decreased. This shoe is light (300 grams), has great responsiveness and fits my feet like a, er, glove. As I have narrow feet, I was able to tighten the laces adequately to fit my feet. The shoe is designed for both road running and trail running and you can really feel the design works perfectly as you move from Road to Trail. Personally, I could hardly tell the difference moving from trail to road or road to trail. The only problem I had with the shoe was “hotspots” on the bottom of my feet after running more than 10 trail miles. These became a serious issue. The shoe midsole is so responsive (read “thin”) that I could literally feel the heat from the trail seeping into the bottom of my feet. If you run trails where it isn’t too warm, this may not be an issue. For me in the Sierras and central valley in the middle of summer, it was a problem that led me to purchase the…


Asics Trabuco: Touted as the “Real Trail Runner” shoe. When put next to the 2140 trail edition, it looks like a Chevy Suburban next to a SmartCar. But the size is deceiving as it is ONLY 30 grams heavier (330 grams) than the 2140 trail edition. The Trabuco has a toe guard around the front of the shoe—so one doesn’t bruise the front of toes while tripping over rocks. Its heel is significantly thicker than the 2140 trail shoe and that is a plus in my book. The Trabuco also is a lot wider in the toebox than the 2140. This is great if your feet swell a lot or if you have average-to-wide feet or if you tend to wear thicker socks. If you have very narrow feet, this might be a deterrent since the tougher outer structure of the Trabuco makes cinching down on the laces more difficult. I do have very narrow feet (I usually wear Nike or New balance Narrow) and it took a while for me to get used to the feeling of my feet moving around in the shoe. The Trabuco also has a much tighter weave for the upper, so theoretically, LESS stuff should get into it than into the 2140 Trail and I did find this to be true for me. .For more technical or longer runs on trail, the Trabuco is definitely your choice (unless you don’t want the extra 30 grams of weight or if your feet are very very narrow.) It also took me time to get used to the way they felt on my feet—like big bricks. They lacked responsiveness—no midfoot bending, etc so I couldn’t really feel the trail under me and that was unusual. However, this was sometimes a plus in my book because of the “hot spots” issue I had with the 2140 trail. Personally, I would rather give up a bit of responsiveness than feel like my feet were on fire. BUT I seemed to trip and fall more with the Trabuco because of the lack of feeling—or maybe I was just clumsier. I am not sure.

So which is better? I use both shoes but for very different runs. The 2140 trail I use for trail runs where I may also need to run on roads or asphalt OR if my trail run is shorter than about 10 miles. Non-technical runs are also best done with the 2140 trail. For runs longer than 10 miles on the trail, very technical trails, or if it is very HOT outside, I switch to the Trabuco. I have to use thicker socks with the Trabuco for my narrower feet and I tend to be more careful about my foot placement as I have fallen down several times with the Trabuco (never with the 2140 trail shoes). My basic rule is, if I have to carry my Nathan Intensity Water pack, (i.e it is very hot outside, the run is long or too technical for me to carry my water in a bottle on my waist) then I need to wear my Trabucos.

The "killer" and other monstrosities--Good News & Bad News Edition

• Bad News: PT confirmed course of action given by MD sports doc--3-6 months off to allow hip and knee to heal fully.
  
  
• Good News: PT took one look at my face and said, "But I can tell you won't do it for awhile and I don't blame you. I'm the same way. Let's try to get your hip strengthened in the meantime"
  
  
• Bad News: Wednesday night speed workout was really a monsterous "killer" hill workout. 6X400 straight up a hill while dodging cars in 90 degree heat.
  
  
• Good News: I completed the run, that honestly I thought was very unlikely at the outset of the workout.
  
  
• Bad News: I am falling behind on my training plan for my next Half Ironman in September.
  
  
• Good News: Everyone I know is also falling behind in their training plan. Ok this isn't necessarily good news--but it is good to know that i'm not the only one.
  
  
• Bad News: I've missed all the thursday trail running races. Boo!
  
  
  
• Good News: I get to trail run on Sunday in Auburn with Tim T. and Mo B.!
  
  
• Bad News: I have so many things going on in life, yet I can't think of a lot to post on my blog.
  
  
• Good News: I don't get paid for blogging.

Next Up: Review of Asics Trabuco and Asics 2140 Trail shoes.

Run like the wind to be free again

Sunday's RUN ROCKED! I had such a good time.

Got to the start point at Cavitt Middle School around 7:15 for the 7:30 start. It was amazing how many people I saw there that I remembered from last year. I talked to "big D" from Trailmomma's blog. She is a wonderfully sweet lady who (last year) always yelled encouraging words to me as she sprinted past.

I also spoke with a few others who I knew from trail running last year, along with a couple of my wednesday track workout comrades that are also doing trail running.

After a quick peptalk by Mo Bartley and Tim Tweitmeyer, we were off for a 5 mile jaunt through trees, over hills and next to folsom lake. The view from the trail was breathtaking! I took a couple of pictures but they really didn't turn out well.

I got a lot of, "You go girl" from Mo which made me laugh as I was leaned over at a 45 degree angle trying to power walk up a steep hill. Mo is awesome.

I managed 1:04 total time for a 5 mile run. I believe actually running time was about 55 minutes. Today my glutes, hammies and quads have that nice, post run ache --not pain-- but I know I worked out yesterday!
Tomorrow is run and bike and wednesday I will hit the pool again and try to get some yardage before work. EEkkk. The 4:20 a.m. swims commence!

Tommorow is another day

I approached todays ride witha bit of trepedation due to it being the first ride since the auburn tri three weeks ago. Gusty winds and 90+ degree weather further raised my anxiety. I took off with a friend and I am SO GLAD THAT I RODE MY BIKE!

I only managed a short 18 miles but I was so happy to get on my bike and ride in the sunshine. Riding buddy and I stopped at Folsom Bike and had a cool beverage. As we sat and chatted about riding bras, cycling computers, and our garmins. It was just so great to get out even for just an hour or so.

Tomorrow I start my long runs with the trail running class, coached by Uber Studs Tim Tweitmeyer and Mo Bartley. Tomorrow's run is just 5 miles but considering my lungs I think it will be a great run for me.

Run details on monday recap!

Tuesday Twenty-ish

• I could get used to not doing anything ever. Since my illness, I’ve allowed myself to indulge in food and drink –drink is usually wine, but the 85+ degree weather the past few days truly creates a need for margaritas. Ice cold margaritas. I thought about trying the “Skinny Girl” margarita (no margarita mix, just soda water and the juice of 2 limes—only 100 calories) but honestly, that just doesn’t sound good. I’ve become a glutton. How do I know? I had a body fat test.
  
• Percent bodyfat I was in high school (caliper test) –18 %
  
• Percent body fat I thought I was – 24%
  
• Percent bodyfat the electrical impedence machine measured me on June 6 –29.5%
  
• Current BMI –25
  
• Height – 5’2”
  
• Weight – 112
  
• That makes me approx 33 lbs of fat.
  
• Husband’s response to my newly elevated percent bodyfat: “Stop eating so much crap.” Uh, no shit Sherlock. Obviously, dietary changes are not my forte.
  
• Took RugRat#2 to see Bodies Revealed. She insisted on going and had been begging me to take her.
  
• RR#2 fainted within 4 minutes of us entering the first gallery.
  
• When she recovered she tried to go outside, took 5 steps and fainted again. I caught her in my beefy (and fatty) arms.
  
• I wheeled her out in a wheelchair.
  
• Bought her a milkshake and then she insisted that we go back and finish the tour.
  
• I agreed but only after convincing her to allow me to push her in the wheelchair through the exhibit.
  
• She did fine the rest of the time—had no problem looking at dissected lungs, smoker’s lungs, penis cancer, even embryos and fetuses (feti?). But the full bodies posing on the bike or holding a baseball bat were too much.
  
• I have mixed feelings about visiting bodies revealed. On one hand, it is totally interesting and a view of humans that nobody ever gets. But despite Chinese Governmental insistence that these people died and had no relatives and donated their bodies to “science”, I never shook the feeling that I was visiting something akin to Dr. Mengele’s house of horrors.
  
• One of my two dogs is getting very sick and old. She has kidney failure and there isn’t much the vet can do for her. She is still HAPPY HAPPY JOY JOY ninety percent of the time but she is having more and more days where she doesn’t do a lot of fetching, begging or running.
  
• I’ve decided that my next run is going to be a 5k called “Alzheimer’s Run” on July 24. I would like to do around 23 minutes for the 5k but we’ll see.
  
  
  
• A quote from Talladega Nights: The Ballad of Ricky Bobby keeps going round and round in my head. Jean Girard saying to Ricky (after breaking his arm), “Your injury is one of Ignorance and Pride”.
  

Good Times at Diva Night-- Friday Five

Pic shows the fun I had a Diva night a few weeks ago. Even though they plied me with LOTS of red wine, I did NOT BUY ANYTHING at Diva Night. That's a first. I usually plunk down a good $200 on necessities (isn't everything a necessity when you are a little toasted?) like Hammer Gel and 4 pairs of biking shorts.

I had a DNF (or was it a DNS?) for my wednesday night run group.Obviously this illness is taking longer to shake than I anticipated.I dragged my carcass through the 2 mile warm up, did one slow (12+ min/mile) track lap and then walked back to my car. I didn't even get to the actual "workout" this week. My lungs are still pretty congested so I am taking time off until next Monday or Tuesday and I'll re-assess then.

Three people are pressuring me to try for an IM in 2011--IM Arizona to be exact. My dream is IM St. George (because I've always wanted to visit Utah's Arches National Park) but I don't know if I am ready to undergo the rigours of an IM schedule. Granted I wouldn't even have to start training until--well-- like a year from now, but the challenge sounds intriguing. "Karen, YOU ARE AN IRONMAN!" Yeah, that has a nice ring to it.

Because of illness, our 10 year anniversary was a bust. Boo. But we're trying to reschedule a nice night out on the town or in San Francisco at our fav restaurant, Millenium. Yea!

I've eaten McDonald's twice this week and I feel like a bloated, overstuffed pig. I need a good vegan raw food cleanse. Or maybe I should just stop eating crap.

Happy 10th Anniversary

Happy 10th Anniversary to the awesomest man in the world.

To another 10 years!

La Roux - Bulletproof

This song is stuck in my head now. It is channeling Depeche Mode's Speak and Spell and the singer reminds me of Tilda Swinson from Narnia series. Aparently, the 80's are back.

You are welcome.

The Race That Almost Wasn't

The Race that almost wasn’t

For me the auburn triathlon was an exercise in tenacity. Not because the race course was hard (it was) or because two transitions can make life a little complex (it did). No, web world, the race almost wasn’t because of issues that occurred in the week before the race. What issues, you ask? Well let me fill you in.
A week and 2 days before the race, I “female” problem that I haven’t had in YEARS reared its ugly, yeasty, head. I had to cut my last ride short because there was no way I could continue riding when I was so uncomfortable. OTC medicines didn’t kill the little bugger, so a scrip from my MD on Tuesday helped the wee-beesties die a horrible death.
This first “female” problem became moot because on Thursday auntie flow showed up with accompanying cramps and swollen ankles. Awesome! Awesome! Awesome!
Friday afternoon I feel a slight tickle in my throat. I ran over to the local thai food place and bought some hot and sour soup and downed it like a drunken sailor in front of a barrel of grog. Upon awakening on Saturday, the sore throat has moved up into my sinuses and I’m stuffed up. Awesome. Awesome. Awesome.
Saturday was packet pick up, and drop off for T2 (running stuff). I spoke with a few Sac Tri Club people but tried to keep my distance since I was feeling kind of crappy. Went home and drank more water than I thought possible. Ate a spaghetti dinner and climbed into bed at a reasonable hour. Set the alarm for 4:45 a.m.
Alarm buzzed and I felt my forehead. It was cold and clammy. Not good. I rolled over and started coughing. Really not good. Got on my feet and rocked a bit due to dizziness. REALLY REALLY not good.
I told my husband, “I think I have a fever”. He felt my forehead and said, “No you have 6 blankets on you. You are fine. Get up.” Unconvinced, I still got up and poured a little coffee into a cup and got dressed. I went into the bedroom after a few minutes and told hubby, “I think I should bail on the race, I don’t feel well and it is 36 degrees outside.”
“Shut up you are going. You’ll hate yourself if you don’t.” Then he uttered the utterly cheesy, “Pain is temporary, quitting is forever.”
Fine.
I got my breakfast and hubby loaded my bike into the truck. We drove to the T1 drop off point. The whole time, the chatter from my husband was non-stop annoying:
“You’ll do great.”
“You are a tough woman. Hear you roar.”
“You’ll kick ass and take names”
“You are fine.”
Don’t get me wrong. I appreciated his pithy words but when you feel lousy and are nervously approaching what you are sure is your doom, you don’t want to hear a lot of chatter.
Finally I said, “Shutup now.” I then told him, “If I get pneumonia, you are the one staying home with me.”
Drop off was about ¾ mile from T1. I got on my bike, backpack strapped to my shivering torso and rode down to T1. I parked my bike and chatted with a friend who was also doing the race. I could barely lift my bike up onto the rack because my hands were so cold when I arrived at T1. Someone announced that it was 35 degrees outside and that there was a 15 mph headwind against us on the uphills.
Awesome Awesome Awesome.

I looked at the lake. The 60 degree lake was steaming because of the difference in temp between the air and the water. I got on my wetsuit.
I got in the water. I was so sure it was going to be cold, but it honestly felt like warm bath water. 60 degrees never felt so good.
I warmed up by swimming a bit and felt good. My nose was running in the water, but honestly, who cared?
Swim Start
I started at the back of the pack because I am a slow swimmer and I didn’t get run over. After we started, I kept having to stop because people in front of me kept stopping. How totally annoying. Finally I pushed past some people and started on my regular stroke. I bobbed my head up for a moment, long enough to see a woman say to me, “I don’t like this at all, I want to go back.” I put my head down and just concentrated on my swim stroke. After the second swim buoy I went off course and started pulling to the right. I looked up. Fk.
Swim time: Garmin said 24:10. Official time 25:XX. Blah.
T1: For this particular race, they bring everything from T1 up to T2 (finish) so competitors must pack all of their things in marked plastic bags. This, of course, can take a while. I stripped my wetsuit and stood shivering in the (now) 38 degree air. I put on a biking jacket, gloves and my bike shoes. I packed everything else in my designated bag. T1 time 9:20
Bike: I have ridden this bike course probably about 10 times in the last few months. The first 8 miles is almost all uphill. What made me feel good is seeing the number of people walking their bikes up these hills. People with Cervelo time trial bikes and with Pinarellos were pushing their bikes up hill on Shirland Tract. Mind you, I wasn’t racing up these hills, but never did I get off my bike and start to walk. Never.
I passed a few people on the hills. I was so happy to hit the turn around though. My chest was really cold and my clogged head was making me dizzy on the bike.
Bike time: Garmin: 1:35 Official: 1:35
T2: I saw my family when I came into T2.Mom, hubby were there. I put on my trail shoes, grabbed my water bottle and was off. T2 time: 2:13.

Run: the run was where I really lost it. I was maintaining a 10 min/mile pace, which considering the throbbing in my sinuses was adequate. The first two miles were fairly flat. Then I turned on to a sharp downhill that went for over a mile down towards the bottom of the canyon. My feet felt like they were on fire and I realized that because they were so cold from the swim and never warmed on the bike, the pounding while I ran was causing intense burning pain. I slowed to a walk. I ran/walked/shuffled to the turn around point and then looked up at 1.25 miles of uphill. Fk me.
I walked most of the uphill back. I tried to throw in a few well intentioned, shuffles and half-hearted runs but I was not really feeling it. I finally came onto the grass near the finish line and smoked past some guy who was in worse shape than I was. Run time: 48:XX
Final time 3:00:02.
The theme of losing it on the run seems to be an issue in triathlon for me. I did one a couple of years ago and again, bonked on the run. It wasn’t that I didn’t have enough calories. I just was mentally exhausted. I obviously need to do brick workouts to get the legs and mind ready for running after a bike. Overall I was pleased with my performance, all things considered. The swim was ok. I did the bike faster than I ever have before which blows my mind. I forgive myself for a crappy run.
The thing that made this race so great were the volunteers. Never have I seen a race course lined with so many happy, cheering and cheerful volunteers. They even joked with me as I stood up and attacked a huge hill on the bike, “There she goes look at her go, she’s like Contador, she’s like Lance.” It made me smile during the race and I think sometimes that is hard to do.
I was so happy when I finished but immediately started coughing. I went to work Monday but stayed home today due to the cold now moving into my lungs. My head is totally clogged and I can’t hear out of my left ear. I am not sure about the next couple of days, but I think I’m going to simply rest, drink lots of OJ and try to feel better. Hopefully it is not pneumonia.
Awesome awesome awesome.

Floyd Landis' doping allegations rock the Tour of California

I don't know what to even say about this new story. I am stunned.

Reporting from Visalia, Calif.-- The cycling community gathered in this farming town for Thursday's start of Stage 5 of the Tour of California was left stunned by allegations made by cyclist Floyd Landis that seven-time Tour de France winner Lance Armstrong and other top American riders were involved in blood doping before 2006.

Landis, who lost his own 2006 Tour de France title because of a failed doping test and was subsequently banned for two years despite years of denials, not only has admitted his own use of performance enhancing drugs during races but also reportedly sent e-mails to cycling and anti-doping officials detailing how Armstrong, George Hincapie, Levi Leipheimer and Dave Zabriskie schemed to engage in blood doping. The Wall Street Journal was the first to report the allegations on their web site late Wednesday night.

All the accused riders are in the Amgen Tour of California, which starts at 10:45 a.m. and travels to south to Bakersfield.

A spokesman for Team RadioShack said team manager Johan Bruyneel, whom Landis accused of teaching him the ins and outs of blood doping, Armstrong and Leipheimer will speak to reporters before Thursday's stage gets underway. Armstrong, however, briefly told reporters Thursday morning that the allegations are not based in fact and denied ever being involved in doping or using performance enhancing drugs.

A spokesman for Dave Zabriskie's Garmin-Transitions team also said a statement would be issued later this morning and a spokesman for BMC Racing, Hincapie's current team, said he would issue a statement about the allegations.

The World Anti-Doping Agency issued this statement Thursday:

"WADA is aware of the serious allegations made by Mr. Landis. We are very interested in learning more about this matter and we will liaise with the United States Anti-Doping Agency (USADA) and any other authority with appropriate jurisdiction to get to the heart of the issues raised. WADA looks forward to these further investigations and enquiries by those responsible.

"Generally speaking, WADA encourages everyone with knowledge of banned practices in sport, including athletes who were caught cheating and who denied the evidence for years, to be forthcoming in disclosing the information they may have to the proper authorities. This will further contribute to clean sport and strengthen existing anti-doping programs for the good of clean athletes worldwide."

Until the Wall Street Journal story and in a later interview with ESPN, Landis had fought the charge that he failed a drug test while riding to the 2006 Tour de France championship.

Landis, who sent e-mails to the USA Cycling Federation and the International Cycling Federation detailing the allegations against his former teammates, had taken his appeals process all the way to the World Court of Arbitration. He ultimately served a two-year suspension and has been trying to get on another world class cycling team, but without success.

Landis even wrote a book, "Positively False: The Real Story of How I Won the Tour de France," that was published in 2007. He asserted in the book that he never used performance enhancing drugs.

The cycling publication VeloNews said it received a copy of an e-mail sent to USA Cycling President Steve Johnson in which Landis accuses Armstrong, Hincapie, Leipheimer, Michael Barry and Jose Luis Rubiera (the latter two also rode for Bruyneel).

Repeated attempts to reach Landis went unanswered, and Johnson was not immediately available for comment.

diane.pucin@latimes.com

Grandma Strikes Again

Sorry for not posting the last few weeks. Family obligations, including two surgeries have kept me too busy to do much of anything other than go to work (sporadically) and eat and train (again, sporadically).

Last night I visited with my Grandma at my mom’s house. She's visiting from India for a few months so i thought I would hang out with her and my mom. As you may recall, my grandma has very definite ideas about how people should behave, dress, etc. (See Here). I was excited to tell her about my upcoming triathlon in Auburn this SUNDAY. She seemed really pleased and asked how far the “running” was.

Me:

Oh, its not just a run. It’s a swim, a bike ride, and a run.

Gma:

Oh, ok. (Pauses) In the same DAY????

Me:

Yes, back to back.

Gma:

But you get to rest in between, right?

Me:

Well I can, but it’s a race so I should try not to rest.

Gma:

What about eating? Isn’t there a lunch in the middle? (like all grandmas she is concerned with making sure everyone eats enough food)

Me:

(Trying to explain about my bike bento box) There’s a little sack you can put on your bike that holds energy gels and granola bars . I eat that if I am hungry while I ride.

Gma:

How long are each of these events?

Me:

1000k swim, 30k ride, 7k run. (India is on the metric system so this was easy).

Gma:

Oh, that’s not too far. You should come in first place, right???

Me:

uh….

Gma:

Oh, I’m sure you’ll be first or second.

Me:

uh…..

I have thought about inviting my Grandma to the race, but with two transition logistics (plus her bad eyesight and propensity to wear heels everywhere) make it a bit difficult. She would need a full-time chaperone and nobody has volunteered to keep an eye on her for the duration of the race. So she will be at temple praying for me while I do my race. Praying that I get first or second, no doubt.

I probably won’t post before race day on Sunday—I’ll have race report on Monday next week.

American River Parkway Half Marathon

First off, I love this race because it is a fairly fast course, you can wear headphones and it is close to my home so there is little travel time involved.

The last time I did this course in 2008 I managed a 2:06. The fastest half marathon for me at the time. I was also taking tons of steroids so my 2008 finish time was partially due to the superpowers given to me by that prednisone prescription. One of the only pictures of me from that race depicts a bloated tuba-bubba trying to finish a run. No, I won’t post a picture of that.

I got up at 5:15 a.m. had coffee, pb&j, checked email. It looked like it would be nearing 80 degrees for the day so I elected on nike shorts, Hawaii tank top, hat and large waterbottle.

Left the house near 6:00 a.m. I wanted to leave earlier, but somehow I got side tracked. Got to William B. Pond park around 6:20 and found that I barely found a parking spot in the park itself. Sat in the car and watched others drive like maniacs looking for parking.


I felt a little dehydrated, so drank my water while sitting in the car and by 7 a.m. I had to pee. Walked to a nearby bathroom and did the business. I then decided to walk around the course start area. Here's some pics of the start being set up, etc.
Went back to the car. At 7:15 I had to go pee again. At 7:35 I had to go again. I decided to stop drinking so much water and do my warm up run.




Warmed up and did one more pee break. Saw two ladies from my Ophir Milan riding group and we talked for a few minutes. Ate a Chocolate Gu and headed for the start. Placed myself right next to the 9 min/mile marker.

Waited for the start.
Waited a few more minutes.
Waited again.

Finally at 8:15, there was some commotion near the front of the pack. The race director was talking, but the speaker near where I was standing wasn’t working so I couldn’t hear a word he was saying.

A bagpipe band cut through the course and headed for the front. I’m not one for bagpipes necessarily but it was a unique touch to the race.

At 8:20 the race started. (I learned later that the delay was due to traffic congestion from the remote parking location—the race director elected to wait until people could get to the start).

Mile 1-3. Had consistent 8:30ish splits. I felt great—my legs felt fresh and even though it was warm, my water bottle was full of cold tasty goodness. After the first mile I systematically started picking people and passing them. It was an awesome feeling!

Mile 4-6.5. Moved from the shaded bike trail up to the levee. I have often run on the levee with various training groups so it wasn’t a big deal but the relentless sun was a difficult to deal with. I tried to ration my water bottle and began taking fluid from the aid stations to supplement my bottle. Pace was still 8:20-8:37.

Mile 6.5-8. The half way point is a 180 degree turn around—we descend off the levee, turn 180 degrees and proceed back up the main bike trail. I was HOT. The sun was directly in my face and the pavement seemed to irradiate heat through my shoes. I know that it was probably only 70 degrees but it really felt overly warm. I stopped and walked through aid station 7 and ate a gu and drank 4 cups of water. My pace slowed to about 9:10 per mile.

Mile 9-12. These were the toughest miles of the race. The shade trees became sporadic along the trail. Sometimes it was nice and cool, and sometimes I got a frontal assault from the sun. I checked my watch at mile 9 and saw it was 1:18 and realized that I could probably make the Sub 2 hour mark even with my slower pace, this really helped me relax and I just focused on trying to pass people. Up ahead, I saw a lady from my running group. I focused on her blue shirt and trying to stay with her. At Mile 11.5 aid station, she ran through and grabbed a water cup while my volunteer fumbled with pouring some water into a cup for me. By the time I looked up, my “pacer” was gone. Drats!

Mile 12-13.1. I looked at my watch and saw 1:46 and realized that I would definitely be doing a sub 2 and started to smile like a fool as I ran to the finish. As I crossed the line, the official clock said 1:58. I glanced at my Garmin and it reported 1:56. Fkn. Hurray.

After my race, my stomach was just wrecked so I didn’t wait for food. I saw “blue short lady” and we talked for a few minutes. She reported one of the fastest guys in our group did a 1:35 for the half! Holy . Crap.

I was really beat after, walked to my car, drove home got cleaned up and ate two HUGE sandwiches and had a coke. Funny, I am never hungry right after a race, but within an hour and a half I am famished almost to the point of blacking out.

So now that I’ve reached my goal of a sub 2 half, I don’t know what to do next. There aren’t any other half marathons in the Sacramento area over the summer (it’s too hot!); There are quite a few trail runs so I may do those but not sure that my time will get faster after doing those.


Lessons Learned:

• HYDRATE HYDRATE HYDRATE for days before the race.
  
• Be ready for any issue. Several reviewers of the race complained about lack of water, cups, etc. I attempt to be self-sufficient and bring my own water, etc.
  
• my knee hurt so I iced for awhile
  

I have my Auburn Sprint in 2 weeks. I can’t believe I am saying this-- I am ready for the race.

ANOTHER PR Baby

Just a quick bulleted list of things. In-depth Race Report of Parkway Half Marathon to come later.

• Chip time--1:56 --Another 5 minutes off my last race and another PR!!!
  
• It was a HOT HOT Day!
  
• Sore legs today!

4 final the to Down

Only one month left until Auburn Tri. The training has been going ok. Knee pain and calf pain have finally subsided a bit, but the loss of training time and intensity caused me to step back and re-evaluate my goals. I decided to officially change to the sprint distance triathlon from the half –ironman in Auburn. It was a hard decision to make, but I just decided that killing myself for one race wasn’t worth it and I was liable to end up more injured. I haven’t done a triathlon in almost 2 years (!) and I think a sprint might be the best way to ease back into Tri Racing.

That being said, the Sprint distance isn’t anything easy—1000k swim in a 55 degree lake; 18 miles on the bike with the first 8 miles being almost straight uphill; and a 7k run on trails. Yeah, I think that’s good for now.

I pre-rode the bike course on Sunday with two (non-tri training) friends. It was great. My split time from Rattlesnake Bar (T1) to Auburn Overlook (near T2) was 37 minutes for 8 miles of 9-14 % grade hills. The first time I rode it, it took nearly 50 minutes to cover the same distance so the time decrease is greeaaaaaaaat!
I rode the rest of the sprint course to Bell Road and back (10 more miles) and my Garmin reported a total time of 1:40. The rest of the course is fairly hilly too.

I am still a “back-of-the-packer” in terms of my riding buddies. Hubby says it is good for me to ride with stronger riders, but I have to admit it is a little discouraging to be huffing and puffing up a hill and watch someone zoom away from you. C’est la vie. I can only keep trying my best and I know from my split times I am getting faster. Just maybe not faster as quickly as everyone else.

Saturday I ran 12 miles in 2:04. It was 78 degrees outside--- beautiful! The calf was still recovering a bit so I did a slower than normal pace. The Parkway half is May 1. I am still secretly hoping to beat 2 hours officially. Shhh don’t tell anyone.

Swimming is of course going well. I have been doing some longer swims even though the sprint is only 1000k. Last weekend I was doing intervals of 300 when an older man swimming in the lane next to me stopped me and asked, “Who taught you your swim technique?” to which I answered, “oh, god is it that bad?”. He laughed and said, “no no! You look very comfortable in the water and your technique is excellent!” I was dumbstruck. Really? After I finished my set and chatted with him and his wife—I was going to let him know about a training group that did open water swim and he said, “well watching your stroke you don’t need that group and from the size of your shoulders, you obviously swim a lot and are very adept at it.” Again. Uhm, WOW! I joked that by the middle of the summer hubby is scared by the size of my back and shoulders and he and his wife laughed.

I have considered doing a trail running series that is on Thursday nights—it looks like so much fun and they have a short 3 mile race option. If I substituted Friday’s morning run for the Thursday ‘race’ I think it would work. I would really like to do it but… coach chad told me that he would ‘advise against it’ since I have a hard speed workout every Wednesday. The Folsom Trail Runners look like they have so much fun though!!!!! Grr!!I

What else? Hmmm… On the personal front, three people I know were either in the hospital or having surgery last week. The worst, was my friend Ms. Tiff who somehow contracted a nasty foot infection after getting a pedicure. Her foot managed to get worse and worse until she was hospitalized for 4 days.



Yeah, I don’t think I will ever get a pedicure again. Seriously.

My grandma is here in USA to attend my cousins wedding. It was so good to see her. I saw her at the reception and she knew who I was right away (her eye sight isn’t so good). No, she didn’t ask about my training…. At least not yet.

Here’s the only pic of me from the wedding.. That shiny glare off my nose is really really awesome.

2 things diagnosed

1. Patellaform syndrome (runner's knee)
2. pulled/strained tendon from calf to insertion point behind the knee.

Fixes:

1. Strengthen VMO (vastus medialis obliqus)
2. rest, ice, possible ultrasound therapy.

I'm of to see the wizard...the wonderful wizard of oz

...Because of the wonderful things he does..

I have been tenderly loving my gamey left knee for a week. It simply doesn't want to cooperate with me. So I took the plunge and called my M.D. and have an appt with him today. He's a good doc--he's run boston several times, does centuries, etc--it's nice to have a doc that understands that i want to run and bike and swim.

In any case, the knee hurts not only in the back, but now in the front, on the left side, and inside of it. It hurts most from cycling but also with running and even with swimming (when i kick). My training has unfortunately come to a halt until I get this taken care of. Hopefully he can figure out the issue and get me rockn' and rollin' again. In any case, I am almost sure that I will need to switch to the sprint distance of the Auburn Tri in May. I haven't been able to do any long workouts since mid March--almost a month.

On the nutrition front: I started to look at my food ingredients a little more closely--I was especially interested in high fructose corn syrup--the satan of food. Now I consider myself a pretty healthy eater, but I was shocked at how many things in my house had high fructose corn syrup.

My favorite boysenberry jam
silk soymilk creamer
my daily soda (or "pop" as it is called in the midwest)
Stove Top Stuffing
Cranberry juice
cranberry sauce
corn flakes (generic)
rice crispies (generic)
raisin bran (generic)
ketchup
mayo
ritz crackers
oreos
wheat thins
tomato paste
baked beans
applesauce
every icecream in the freezer (I don't eat it but it's there for the rugrats)
every salad dressing in the fridge
various sauces in the fridge including A-1, jim beam, and "dippin' sauce".
Prego (I suspect-- I threw out the jar before I remembered to look, but prego is somewhat of a 'sweet' marinara so i bet it is in there)
I'm not sure what to think of all this. Is going organic better? It was a bit frightening though to see this stuff in almost every packaged food I have.

Hopefully the doctor visit goes well. I'll post my diagnosis as soon as I can.

Turn You Inside Out

Been so busy at work, no time to update my blog.

Latest for Tri Training.

Rode 51 miles of the Auburn course--OUCH. Perfect discription is-- It turned me INSIDE OUT.

Tried to ride whole course two weeks later and had an EPIC FAIL due to calf/hamstring issues and bike mechanical problems. D'oh!

Managed to do 3 X 1 mile repeats at 7:54, 8:04, 7:59 during my track workouts.

Even though my 24 hour closed for repairs to the pool, I've managed to keep up my swimming--I am more relaxed in the water for sure. Up to 2600 yards, two - three times per week.

I lost 7 lbs in one week because I wasn't eating enough after my long rides. I also turned into this about an hour later.




I'm pretty proud of my riding and how far it has come along. I'm still a back of the packer, but at least i'm not MILES back.

Parkway half marathon is in 3 weeks. I hope I can break 2 hours on the run (officially).

I was doing a track workout two weeks ago and come to find out (by reading the blog) that Kristen was doing the track workout too. I didn't recognize her or know her so we didn't talk. Hoping we can catch each other on the track and meet officially face to face.

That's it for now. In unrelated news, I've recently picked up and started on the Satanic Verses. It's kinda slow so far.

Shamrock’n Half Marathon Race Report Aka The Bitch is Back

This race report is going to be full of sparkle and sunshine since I PR’d (Boo-ya!).

This is my second time doing the Shamrockn’ half marathon. I did it in 2008 with a finish time of 2:17. Not great--but ok.

I should preface the race report by saying that my goal for the race was to get under 2:15. I thought I would be able to get under 2:10 but because I had been sick for almost two weeks I didn’t want to psych myself up only to be disappointed. I figured a 2:15, even with the time lost due to illness—would be doable.

I checked my email the night before the race and found a notice from the race director reminding everyone about the parking shortages, “please carpool” yada yada. I clicked on the “FAQs” link and read through some of the info. I discovered that USATAF amended their “NO IPOD” rule and that as long as I wasn’t competing for prize money, or in a championship, I COULD WEAR MY IPOD!!

I was stoked. The friend who I was slated to run with, bailed due to a pulled hamstring. Before reading the email, I was convinced I was about to embark on 13 long lonely miles without a soul to talk to… The IPOD change made things a lot easier. Quickly, I loaded a couple of new playlists that included Lada Gaga, Rob Base, Depeche Mode, Jay Sean, Genesis, Maria Carey, Aqua and some other weird stuff. Hey don't judge me by my music. The 80s and 90s were good to me. I was set for the morning.

I awoke at the butt crack of dawn. Really. The “spring forward’ happened that same night so I essentially lost an hour of sleep. Because of the parking issues the race director recommended arriving at Raley Field NO LATER THAN 6:30. Past experience showed me that the freeway offramp was jammed by 6:15. I resolved to beat the traffic by waking at 4:30 and leaving by 5:15.

I drank my coffee, had some water, did the “business”, had some PB & J on a bagel. I went to the garage and opened the garage door. The dogs, who sleep in the garage BOLTED out (presumably after a cat). Than not only ran out of our yard, but they ran down to the end of the court and then turned left towards a busy street. I obviously couldn’t yell or whistle at 5:15 in the morning without upsetting the neighbors, so I ran after them and hissed, “SHASTA AND RAINIER GET OVER HER NOW. BAD DOG BAD DOGGGG!!!” They finally turned around and I grabbed their collars and yanked them back home and into the garage. Naturally I then had to go back in the house and re-wash the dog hair/smell off my hands. By the time I pulled out of my driveway it was 5:25.

Driving on the freeway so early was a welcome relief. No one was on the road. I finished my PB & J, continued sipping on my coffee and took a few swigs of water.

The exit came quickly. There was no traffic. I entered the parking lot—as the 10th person there!!

Parked right in front, turned off the ignition and sat back. Relaxed. Ahhhh…It was 5:40.

I watched other cars come into the parking lot..at 6 I decided, it was time to take a little potty break. I headed into Raley field and found the bathrooms and did the business. After leaving I saw my friend Tiff setting up the STC booth. She was putting on pink racing flats. She is so fast as a runner! It was freezing out (35 or so I think) so I told her good luck and ran back to the car.

I sat in the car and half rested until 7. The parking lot was full by now and people were streaming in and out of Raley field. I thought since it was an hour until the start, I should try to head for the bathroom again.. just in case.

Inside Raley field was what I can only describe as pandemonium. The lines for the bathrooms—at least 100 women deep. The line snaked around the food concourse and the booths and headed outside. Ridiculous. I walked around thinking, “I really don’t need to go that bad.” I walked back to the car and slipped off my sweats, changed from Uggs to running shoes, and strapped on my Garmin. I went back into Raley field at 7:20. By then the bathroom lines had swelled even further. Crap. With an 8 a.m. start and the announcements for the race starting, I knew I wouldn’t get through the line before the start. I half considered peeing in front of my car, but people kept walking on the concourse right above where my car was parked and they could easily look down on me. So that idea was scrapped. There were no porta-potties around Raley field that I could see, so I resolved to just wait until I was on the course and use one of the porta-potties during the race. Not ideal, but hell what could I do?

At about 7:40, I started a slow warm up of approx 1 mile. I retied my shoes. I checked my Garmin. 7:55.

I got in the corral for wave 2. It was freezing. Seemed to get colder between 6 and 8 a.m.

At 8 a.m the first wave went. We were up. I looked around for awhile and discovered I was standing next to someone I knew from triathlon. We hugged and talked and then put on our game faces.

The horn blew for our wave. It took me 40 seconds to cross the start line. I wanted to start out a little slow since it was so freakin cold outside.
I ran into (literally) a lady I used to run with during my CIM training. We chatted for about ¾ mile laughing and catching up. Then I realized, that a speed walker just passed us. It occurred to me that I was supposed to be racing, not talking, so I bid adieu to Anita and moved my feet a little faster.

Mile 1—10:21 split. The somewhat slower time was due to talking with Anita and not concentrating on the race. I started to warm up a bit but was happy to realize that I had dressed appropriately.. Short sleeve shirt, arm warmers, mittens, capris.

Mile 2 –8:49. Stopped at the first porta-potty I saw. I stood in line for about 20 seconds before one of them opened up for me. I got in, shut the door and realized that I had mittens on and had to peel those off before I could drop trough. Did the business and got out of there. My garmin stopped in the porta potty (auto pause) and then started again once I got outside. (this is significant later).

Mile 3 – 9:03. After cowtown, I discovered that I need to eat every few miles. I ate a Gu, chocolate flavored. Because there was no garbage can readily available and I couldn’t just throw it on the ground, I sort of tucked it into the band of my waist pack so that I could grab it to throw easily when I did find a garbage can. Later I found that it left this really gross brown, smeared mark on my white shirt. Really gross.

Mile 4 – 9:09. I started to pass a few people as they stopped to get water from aid stations. That was cool. I passed the 2:10 pacer. That was cool.

Mile 5 – 8:54. continued to pass people. High fived one of my old CIM coaches who was cheering on the side of the road. Dropped into Old Sacramento and ran next to horse poop dropped by an ol’ horse. Ran on some cobblestones/bricks. Felt pretty good.

Mile 6 – 9:06. Crossed the Tower Bridge again. It was lined with people cheering. Saw a co-worker and yelled “hi”. High fived another old coach who was screaming at us, “RUN LIKE THE WIND”. Sun was just starting to really shine.

Mile 7 – 9:01. I ate another gu (vanilla) and noticed I was half done with my water. Perfect timing. Total time running on the Garmin said 1:03. Maria Carey’s Fantasy was on the IPOD, along with Jay Sean’s Down.

Mile 8 – 9:14 started to feel a bit fatigued. In the past, I would have stopped to walk right now. But somehow, I didn’t. I kept running (albeit, slightly slower). Aqua’s Barbie Girl was playing on my IPOD, I hit repeat twice so I could listen to it again.

Mile 9 – 9:09. started to see all the runners heading back to Raley field. They were about 2-3 miles ahead of me. I saw the 2:00 pacer who was probably 5 minutes ahead of me (the course loops around a lot) and realized I wouldn’t catch her.

Mile 10 – 9:20. this mile is kind of a blur. I was on the levee running. I saw some people pass me including a girl who was completely sleeved. She scared me. I think I decided not to eat any more Gus since my stomach was a little wobbly.

Mile 11 – 9:22. Now that I was on the second part of the loop back I started to see all the people still heading out. Wow. I was ahead of people. I walked through an aid station and drank two itty bitty cups of water. Looked at my Garmin and it said 1:39. I realized that I might be able to make a sub 2 half marathon if I hustled; therefore, I started to hustle.

Mile 12 – 9:14. almost done. Continued to pass people, but people also started passing me. The pace picked up considerably at this point. My water bottle was empty.

Mile 13 – 9:09. I started to sprint at this point, rounded the corner and burst through the gate into Raley Field. Red gravel crunched under my feet. I sprinted to the end and through the shoot. It was awesome. Garmin said 1:59:58.

Volunteer handed me a medal and some water. Walked up the stairs and chatted with some friends at the STC tent. Decided to forgo the LONG LINE for free food and headed for the car delighted that I beat my old course time of 2:17 by 18 mintues!!!

Called hubby and told him the good news. Started the car and drove home. On the freeway, there was a nagging idea…something not quite right. Then I realized that my garmin had stopped in the porta potty. I was a little disappointed to confirm this later—my official time 2:01.

However, taking 16 minutes off my previous course time is AWESOME! I also PR’d on the distance by 10 minutes!

If you want to see pics.. go here. Like my striped mittens?


Whoohoo! My new goal is sub-2 at my next half marathon the Parkway half on May 1.

Manic Monday

Quick bullets on the week's events... more detail later.

• Ran Shamrockn' Half Marathon yesterday. I PR'd on the same course by 17 MINUTES!!Official Time was 2:01
  
  
• I PRd over the same distance by 10 MINUTES
  
  
• Speed workout last week entailed a 2 mile run on the track. I did 2 miles in 16:02!!
  
  
• I'll post mile splits and race report later this week. Suffice to say I'm feeling GREAT!
  

Step on: Case of the Happy Mondays

My struggle over working out reached its zenith last weekend. I did nothing but watch “HIGH SCHOOL REUNION” marathon and eat and sleep. I couldn’t get the energy to work out. No run. No bike. No swim. I knew something was seriously wrong so I pulled out my ol’ trusty, “Triathlete’s Guide to Mental Training” and started reading.

Wow. So I figured out why I’ve been in a horrible funk the last couple of weeks.

The bad weekend really took a toll on my confidence. A real toll. Oh, I know, it probably was obvious to everyone reading, but not to me. I’m a little slow sometimes. For some, the lack of confidence comes from a single bad workout. I had 3 bad workouts in 1 weekend. No wonder I felt awful. Lack of confidence sucks away motivation. No motivation = no workout.

Basically, this happens to a lot of people (according to the book) after a bad training episode or a bad race. Like a lot of people, I started to question my abilities: to train, work full time, enjoy my life, be a good step-mom and wife, and volunteer.

So I sat on my ass and ate. That is something I can do. Well.
I licked my wounds, and licked the frosting out of the Pillsbury frosting container.

The day I resolved to ride my bike again, my husband crashed badly on his. That scared me. A lot. He is still recovering.

Mental Training didn’t have an exact prescription for fixing the psychological catastrophe. I’m talking to some people in my tri group. The rain is back for the next 6 days so I can’t ride but I can run. I can swim. I can do 30-day shred and yoga DVDs.

Can I guarantee a workout tonight? No. But I can tomorrow—it’s my run group through Fleet Feet.

Poker Face

I lived through the bad week I wrote about here.

Not surprisingly, the stress of the week allowed a little "wee-beasty" to take refuge in my nose/sinus and caused a nasty little cold.

I let the fever cook for a few days and I finally felt better yesterday. I have not worked out at all for 1 week.

Tomorrow's run is a 14 miler. I'll be running to granite bay and back again. I don't know why, but running to another town sounds so, uhm, impressive.

Sunday is a ride with the Tri group along part of the Auburn Tri course.

Yesterday Hubby wrecked bad on his bike commuting to work. I had to leave work and take him to emergency. His helmet is cracked in 3 places, but i'm grateful that he is basically ok. Broken thumb, along with a hemotoma the size of a grapefruit on his leg. His bike is pretty beat up. Karma ran over his dogma. I have pics, but I'm not sure I should post them. They are really really gross. Really. If I get enough requests, I might do it though.

I decided against doing Vineman. I was really sad when i reached that conclusion, but finances being what they are, I have to consider the bigger picture and spending $400+ for a race, hotel, food, etc simply isn't going to happen this year.

I also opted out of Wildflower in order to do the practice Auburn Tri on April 25.
Focus is on Auburn Tri May 23 and Shamrockn' half marathon on two weeks.

Oh, and I decided to grow my hair out long again.

New Allegations in Floyd Landis Case

02.22.2010 | 11:40 am
A Note from Fatty: A big thanks to Dug for helping me “research” many of the allegations in this news piece.
PARIS (Fat Cyclist Fake News Service) - Floyd Landis, former Tour-de-France champion and longtime sporter of scruffy facial hair, has recently found himself facing a France-based arrest warrant for hacking into the French anti-doping agency AFLD.
Pierre Bordry, head of the AFLD, asserts that “Landis, under cover of the night, wearing black cycling tights and black long-sleeved cycling jersey, snuck into our lab, where — using the mad computer skills he developed in the Computer Hacking Class he took at the local Mennonite Technical College — he proceeded to download all of our most sensitive data, and uploaded all kinds of malware and trojan horses and tasteless, photoshopped images of Thomas Voeckler.”
“Quite clearly, this was Landis’ work,” continued Bordry. “As evidenced by the way he wrote “Floyd wuz here” and “Metallica ROOLZ” on a whiteboard near the computer where he was working.”
“Also, he left candy wrappers, PBR cans, and cookie crumbs all over the place,” continued the AFLD head. “Landis is — in addition to being a doper, hacker, and ninja-like break-in artist — a total slob.”
And today, additional allegations have come to light, casting a still-darker shadow on the already well-shaded cyclist.
More Seriously Illegal Doping Problems
Bordry asserts that, far from merely doping himself, “Floyd Landis also made other people dope. He was sneaking EPO into Basso’s juice, giving Iban Mayo HGH under the pretense that it was mayonnaise, and secretly sneaking all manner of noxious concoctions into Tyler Hamilton’s herbal remedies.”
“We are confident, in fact, that Floyd Landis is responsible for every single doping incident that has ever happened. And for several which have not happened yet,” continued Bordry, his voice quivering with emotion.
Concluded Bordry, “Floyd Landis is the root cause of all doping in the whole universe and must be stopped at once.”
Still More Allegations
Landis’ offenses are not limited to cycling-related activities, according to French authorities. In addition to doping, Landis is guilty of and / or wanted for questioning in France for the following offenses:
• Being the originator of the term “Freedom Fries”
• Owning several McDonald’s franchises in Paris
• Disliking very thin pancakes
• Knocking down and ridiculing a mime, simply because the mime was wearing a beret
• Being possibly descended from Henry V
• Claiming to not consider Amelie to be the best film ever made
• Wearing excessively gauche attire
• Drinking beer while eating fish, instead of going with a nice white wine
• Causing the French defeat in the Battle of Dien Bien Phu
What This Does NOT Mean
According to Bordry, none of this has anything to do with circumventing the conclusion of Landis’ suspension from ranks of professional cyclists and keeping Landis out of France — and hence, from ever making another attempt at a Tour de France win. “Of course we realize that we are investigating Landis for a crime to which another person has already confessed,” said Bordry. “But we want to be absolutely certain.”
When asked why this warrant has not been distributed outside of French territory, Bordry remarked, “That is an excellent question, and I hereby issue an arrest warrant for you, should you ever enter France.”

Things that make you go "HMMMmmm"

This post will have quite a few bad words, explatives, and me pondering the ontological mystery that is "LIFE". This post may be considered a "bitchfest". Consider yourself warned.

The last few days have been a shitstorm of crap.
Last week went well. Did all my workouts--didn't even skip one. Was good on my paces for speed work. After what seemed like a million weekends of rainy weather, the NWS promised blue skies and sunny 70-degree weather--and it was a 3-day weekend! All should have been well.

But--oh, it was about to get bad.

I started saturday with a ride with my tri group. Ride was supposed to be 40-50 miles and cover the first 1/3 of the Auburn Triathlon course. Perfect. Just what I have been wanting to do.

I got to the starting point, unloaded the bike, got geared up and said the usual pleasantries to the other group members. All was awesome. Perhaps bulleted points might be the best way to describe the events of the next hour.

• Realized that although I loaded myself up with tons of food, i forgot a second water bottle.
  
• realized that the 40 mile group wouldn't be stopping for water.
  
• Got ditched by the 40 mile group when I was stopped at a turn signal and nobody realized it but me.
  
• Decided to make the best of the situation and go through Rolling hills with the group going 20 miles. Considered doing two-20 mile loops.
  
• Realized I didn't have water for two-20 mile loops either.
  
• Realized that the 20 mile loop was really only 16 miles.
  
• Realized that although I can climb ok, my descents suck.
  
• Got home and tried to whine to my husband.
  
• He told me to 'man up' and that it was my own fault for getting ditched. As if I wasn't already feeling bad enough.
  
• Yelled at my husband in front of everyone on my street.
  
• He yelled back (as he was leaving for his bike ride), "get cancer and die."
  
• I cried.
  
  
  Oh, this was just Saturday. There are two more days in the long weekend.
  
  
• Sunday's 12 mile run went really well. 1:53 for 12 miles.
  
• because my legs were so toasted from the long run, I decided to put off my swimming time trial until monday.
  
• I drank a lot mostly because RR#2 was working my last nerve with her, Oh my god it's valentines day and i didn't get to see my boyfriend crap. Then she cried for 2 hours, then she yelled at us for ruining her life. Great. Pass the Boeger Barbera please. I spent sunday evening drinking margaritas and red wine. A lot of red wine.
  
  Monday started out really promising. I slept in and then decided to hit the pool for my timetrial. 1000 yards as fast as I can.
  
• Got to the pool at noon. 4 people per lane. No joke. And not 4 graceful, people. 4 writhing and twisting and running in place and trying to learn how to swim people.
  
• I watched everyone and carefully chose a lane that had 2 men it it who were going slow, but doing continuous freestyle laps. That's the ticket!
  
• Got punched in the head, face, and leg by the bozos.
  
• Switched lanes and commented to the guy that I needed to change lanes before I ended up like Robin Tyson.
  
• Guy yelled at the two guys in my prior lane and almost started a fight.
  
• Finally gave up on trying to swim after two elderly ladies entered my lane and started standing at the shallow end and talking. Not swimming, not blowing bubbles. Just blocking the end of the lane and chatting about their grandkids.
  
• Got home and showered only to realize I promised hubby that I would go mtn. biking with him.
  
• "OK" I said, "But it has to be an easy pace and only a couple of miles."
  
• 3 miles and two big hills later I asked to turn around. He yelled at me, calling me all sorts of names and saying it was embarrasing that I was always last in my age group.
  
• I walked my bike back to the car, because according to idiot, I shouldn't have a mountain bike anyway.
  
• Impaled the back of my right calf on the front gear ring.
  
• Calf looks infected now.
  
  Tuesday.
  
• Fought more with hubby via email, phone, and text message.
  
• Started to really question my sanity over doing the Auburn Triathlon. What the hell am I doing? Why? What am I doing here? I'll never finish. I won't even make the swim cutoff.
  
• Got into an argument with my mom over my lack of attention to her because of my training.
  
  Wednesday
  
• Continued to question my training committment.
  
• Realized that the ONE day of the year that the Auburn Tri Course is OPEN for PRACTICE is the same day as the Wildflower Century.
  
• When I registered for wildflower I paid registration ($55) + bought jersey ($75) + bought "SPECIAL CENTURY FINISHERS JERSEY" ($75).
  
• Still questioning what I should do. Then I got this email.
  
  Hi Karen,
  This email is to inform you that you have been accepted off the waitlist for the 2010 Vineman Ironman 70.3. Please read the instructions below and then follow the link to sign up for the race.
  
  You will have 7 days to complete your registration process. After that date you will no longer be considered for the event and your name removed from the waitlist acceptance list.
  
  Once on the registration page you will need to select your name from the drop down box. Then you will need to put in your password.
  

FK me. Really?

Friday Five Ten

Friday Five Ten

• Decided to forgo the Super Bowl run in order to ride 60 miles on my bike. Sunday was the only sunny day available to ride in more than a week so I had to RIDE. Running was optional so I blew off the race. Not a good start to the 2010 race season but the weather has been so bad, I have to take the riding days when I can.
  
  
• Apparently I was moved from the “A group” (aka slowest) to the “B Group” in my FIT training weeks ago. I just never got the email from my trainer. I was feeling really good about “blowing away” the 76 year old man and the 55 year old woman in the A group during our intervals. B group is full of 30-something women who are ass kickers in their age group. The kind of women who yell, “Go Girl GO!” as they pass you sprinting around the track. Now, I’m scared.
  
  
• I watched “The Soloist” last night on HBO and it made me cry. Such a good story, but also so very very sad. I tried hard to hold back the tears but it was no use. Then hubby came into the bedroom with his eyes red and teary. He was watching the same thing in another room. I don’t know what’s sadder—the movie OR the fact that we were isolated in our own house experiencing the same emotional turmoil.
  
  
• Work is crazy. Really Crazy. People are cranky and upset all the time. I smile at everyone while I walk down the hallway for my 50th pee break of the day. I’m sure co-workers think I’m high. I don’t’ care though, cause my new-ish boss thinks I’m doing “Excellent” work. Not bad for being in the fiscal field and never even taking one econ, accounting, budgeting or business course in my whole life. Not bad at all.
  
  
• I’m reading “THRIVE” by Brendan Brazier. Good info, but not sure that I buy everything he’s selling. Yes fruits, veggies, etc are good for all of us. But eating them a lot will send me to the bathroom a lot. And there is no way I’m eliminating coffee from my diet. No. Way. NO WAY! Step away from my coffee mug and nobody gets hurt.
  
  
• The “pool drain walker” was doing his thing on Wednesday morning at the 24 hour fitness pool again. It was creepy.
  
  
• This weekend is a three-day-er so I hope I find time to ride my mountain bike. Hubby insists.
  
  
• I’ve decided I don’t like swim fartlek intervals. Yes I’m sure.
  
  
• I rode an “easy” 1:30 yesterday on my road bike. At a certain point I had to wait for a light to change before I could continue across a crazy busy road. A car pulled up behind me but waited so far back that her car wouldn’t trigger the light. I motioned for her to move forward (I was basically waiting in the crosswalk). The twit was so busy talking on her CELL PHONE that she either (a) didn’t see me motioning to her or (b) thought I was a looney waving at her. In any case, I decided to wait for her to figure out that the light wasn’t changing –then she would figure out to move her car forward ON HER OWN. I waited through 4 light changes while the twit talked and laughed on her fkn CELL PHONE and cars behind her were honking at her. Then when she finally did trigger the light she had the nerve to BUZZ me in her massive SUV, talking on the CELL PHONE, while I was in the bike lane!!! Again TWIT!!! GRRR!
  
  
• After she buzzed me, I flipped-off the lady (above). It made me feel better.
  

Seeds of Triathlon

When I was a kid, my parents would whisk the whole family off for summer vacations to their ancestral homeland—India. The culture shock of going from Northern California –McDonald’s, Datsun pickups, stoplights and lane lines to India—land of home-cooked meals, Fiats, and no discernable traffic laws boggled my mind.

Every two years my parents packed us up and we headed on the whirl-wind trip through Japan, Thailand and onto New Delhi. From New Delhi, we usually took a 13 hour drive by taxi to my grandparent’s house. We alternated between one set of grandparents and the other every couple of weeks. We went to the Bazaar by a bicycle-pulled rickshaw. The Rickshaw ‘driver’ (I don’t’ know why he was called a driver, as he was usually pulling 6 people—not driving) was often a skinny guy with tiny ankles straining to pull us up a hill toward the bazaar. We, as the landed gentry sat back and spoke haughtily about how much we spent on this-or-that, while gazing downward at all the proletariat walking or running to a job or home. But I was often intrigued and pittied the man who had to pull me, my brother, my mom, my dad, and usually at least one grandparent close to 5 miles. Somehow the idea that manual work was for—well, others—became ingrained in my psyche as a young girl. Physical labor was for those who couldn’t afford to NOT do physical labor.


As I got older, we went less and less. High school commitments kept my busy most summers. Then summer jobs thwarted my parent’s plans for “one more family vacation.” Finally, college beckoned and with it, the idea of traveling overseas, when I could be making money at home, seemed stupid.

Finally, my last trip to India was in the summer of 1993. Two of my grandparents had died. It was before my last year in college and I wanted to have some fun before I made the final push to get the elusive Bachelor of Science degree. Plus my boyfriend was going to Germany for the summer, so I’d probably be bored sitting around all summer.

But I had changed. The idea that doing something physical meant that you were ‘lower than’ no longer struck a cord with me. I tried to go for short runs in the oppressive heat only to have my Aunts and Uncles yell at me that I would surely die after a few steps (seriously—they thought I would keel over). I wanted to ride a bike to the bazaar for some shopping—but everyone said, “but people will think you are poor. Come, we can go in our new air conditioned Mercedes.” I asked about swimming opportunities in the canals nearby, but it was totally unheard of for a young lady to show anything other than her arms and face outside. So I languished. I had servants bring me breakfast, lunch, dinner, tea and snacks. They folded my laundry, drew me baths, and cooked my meals. And I sat. and I ate. And yet, I wanted to be outside DOING something.

I guess it was during that last trip in 1993 that the seeds of future triathlons were planted. Everyone telling me “NO” started a fire in me that burns to this day.

Why am I writing all this? My only remaining grandparent is my maternal grandmother. She is extremely old fashioned. She doesn’t’ think girls should ride bikes because it isn’t ladylike. In any case, she has heard through the family grapevine that I started running. “Running? Really? But Karen will get darker? What does ‘hubby’ say about this?”

When she heard I swam in the lake she was concerned about my attracting “undue” attention from men and how could I swim without being fully clothed and what did my husband think about me going around half naked in water?

But the funniest thing—the thing I can’t stop laughing about—is when she was told that her oldest granddaughter (me) rode 45 miles on her bike a few weeks ago. Her response, “Why the @&$# did she do that? Did her husband lose his job? Did they wreck their car?” It never occurred to her that I enjoyed riding my bike. That all those years of “NO” have created a personality that says “YES I CAN, DAMMIT!”

Yesterday, I rode 60 miles on my bike in 3:44. It was my longest ride ever.

I can’t wait to call my grandma this evening and tell her.